Discipleship or Eugenics?

Most people know the first word but not the second, and few would ever guess the connection between the two in the context of raising up leaders. Eugenics is a dark science that sprang from Darwinism. It basically tried to improve humanity by sterilizing those races or economic groups deemed to be substandard so that only the so-called best of humanity could multiply. In other words it allowed only a special class to bear fruit. The worst modern example of eugenics in action was the Holocaust.

When I was a young believer a school of thought had crept into the church which said the people most capable of changing society with the gospel were the ones that were already the cream of the crop. Some Christians were even told to target these people with evangelism and to bypass “ordinary” people. Even recently in the former Soviet Union this teaching has gained new ground where one Christian leader actually said that revival or lasting change could never come from “ordinary” people. It would only come when great world leaders repented. See Gattaca for some shock value.

All of this runs counter to everything in God’s word, and the ultimate root of this perspective I believe is a desire for success in the eyes of men. I thought that I was immune to it myself until I found an inner voice saying, “Don’t waste too much time with these people. They are not movers and shakers. They will take too much work to clean up.” Ah! Even though I did not agree with this I had still heard this teaching enough to have been stained. I am now glad to be free of it!

The subtle cancer of eugenics pops up all over the place in Christianity, and I have wanted to say the following for over 20 years. Why do Christian ministries hire models for church or ministry promotional photos rather than using their own people? Wow, it felt good to say that! Even though most of us do not hire models to represent our faith we do hire professionals to do the ministry that we ourselves should be doing.

I am thankful to have heroes of faith, but an over-reliance on the “super pastor” can essentially render the rest of us fruitless. The biblical purpose of leadership is to lead and equip others to minister, not to atrophy the potential of others by doing it all ourselves because we think we are the best at doing it.

I am not naïve in my position here because I do know that functional people can bring stability to a ministry when they come to Jesus, and dysfunctional people can be high maintenance for many years. However, we should try to reach and train them all and not be a respecter of persons.

I have seen functional people get saved and grow quickly as leaders as God used their natural abilities to advance His kingdom. There are also functional people who are self-reliant and stubborn about yielding to God. I have seen people from the so-called bottom of society rise incredibly by the grace of God out of profound dysfunction and bondage to a position of leadership and fruitfulness that simply confounded my reasoning.

What is the lesson in all this? Judging people by their appearance, abilities and position in life is ultimately judging God as an inept creator and an impotent redeemer. It is also a subtle seed of humanism which is a nice way of saying a spirit of antichrist.

Below our skin we are all the same. The same DNA. The same nature. The same price that was paid. The same glory given to God when one is saved. Shepherds, fishermen and one Carpenter can still turn the world upside down.

For consider your calling, brethren, that there were not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble; but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, and the base things of the world and the despised God has chosen, the things that are not, so that He may nullify the things that are, so that no man may boast before God. 1 Cor 1:26-29

Preparing to Speak

Just recently I passed a milestone in my ability to speak Russian. There are still days when I can barely ask for directions in the morning because that part of my brain still hasn’t felt the coffee, and I still can’t say “barber shop” (par–ik–ma-kher) to save my life. But I can now preach – some would call it stammering - in Russian rather freely without a translator. However, for a safety net there are usually a few bilingual friends on the front row just to throw me a few hints along the way when I stumble with a word.

I also noticed that I sometimes actually preach better than I speak. This was odd at first, but I soon figured out the simple reason why. I can prepare my topic ahead of time, I can craft my message and pray about it to make sure it is from God and I can test it with select friends to make sure it is relevant and understandable. This all helps me to be a better communicator for God and also lessens the chance that I will make an absolute fool of myself. However, in everyday conversation I often do make a fool of myself using the wrong word or just creating some kind of Slavic-inspired sound that causes people to squint their ears in confusion.

Now imagine that everyone had to go through a preparation process before they actually said anything to anyone. You have to make sure that that what you say is from God and that it is not stupid of offensive. You have to make sure that you actually know what you are talking about, and you have to make sure that those who hear you will understand what you are talking about.

One of the problems with this world and even in the church is that people just don’t prepare to say the oftentimes offensive and ignorant things that they say. Their words just spill out their mouths as they are jostled to and fro by the trials and circumstances of life, and very often what spills out is quite unsavory. Since opinion is less dense than truth it usually floats to the top and is the first thing to spill over and be heard.

As Christians we need to stay filled with God’s word so that when we are bumped only good things spill out. We also need friends on the front row of our lives who will lovingly correct us when we are just not making any sense. Lastly, we simply need to be prepared in our hearts to speak in season and out so that our words can change circumstances and not be a byproduct of those circumstances.

Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. Eccl 5:2

Gossip Part 2: Appeasement, Correction or Rebuke?

Most gossip can be stopped by preemptive positive comments. We can’t anticipate what others will say, but if we are in a group we can sometimes sense the direction conversations might lead. Gossip – our untamed tongues - is a part of our old baggage that God is still working on, and for most it is an occasional lapse that we regret.

However, for some it is a very bad habit that is based in bitterness, insecurity or it is the only way they can make themselves look good - by lowering others. The gossiper often fishes for a response to see if others will volley. You know the guy. He makes a joke or a verbal slight, then looks around for approval and then he ventures further out on thin ice. Each time he goes through this routine he gets more and more comfortable with the wagging of his tongue. It just flaps in the wind.

Sooner or later the tongue will start a great fire, so as Christians it would serve us all if we did some fire prevention. The first rule is: Don’t volley! Just don’t answer. Don’t smile. Don’t laugh. This is kind of hard when everyone else is laughing.

Appeasement
I am from North Carolina where everyone is very polite. We just ignore stupidity and let people make an ass of themselves. Then we talk later about how they made an ass of themselves. However, appeasing the bigmouth violates community. It weakens our discernment and strengthens the root of evil because evil gets more comfortable and brazen with practice. As a young Christian and leader my common response to gossips was, “Hmm, that’s interesting.” I just did not like confrontation.

Correction
The best and easiest way to stop gossip is to inoculate the situation. For example, a new acquaintance who has a loose tongue says, “Did you hear about what ______ did?” We can say, “I know him. He helped me in the past. Is he ok?” This immediately lessens what this guy is willing to say at the risk of offending you.

Sometimes, we have to be a little more direct in a group when the snowball gets rolling. “Listen, I know this seems important, but I know this guy and his family. It might be appropriate to discuss this issue, but it is not here and not in this fashion.” If we do this humbly we will only gain respect and set a standard.

Rebuke
Some people still don’t get it, so we have to take them to the side. “Friend, I don’t know if someone has offended you, but what you are saying is really hurtful. Can we talk about this? Maybe I can help?”

Some have crossed the line so many times that they are brazen in their public tongue wagging. I have encountered this only a few times in 15 years of pastoring. Someone, usually a guest with an axe to grind, tries to dominate a meeting with bitterness and accusation. First I would say, “Sir, this is not the appropriate place for this. We can talk elsewhere.”

If they don’t heed this then I say, “We care for you, and you are welcome but what you are doing is not welcome. Let God touch your heart and heal you.”

Finally, I might have to say. “Sorry, you have to leave. No discussion.” This was done to maintain order and protect the fellowship. I have only done it twice.

Appeasement is a cancer, but constant gentle correction as well as setting positive standards will stop the snowball before it gets too big.

So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! James 3:5

Gossip: I’m Glad They Don’t Talk About Me

Wow, I am such a fortunate guy. Let me explain. I have noticed a trend over the years that whenever I am with other people they never speak badly about me. However, they do sometimes speak badly of others, but I can dismiss this because they don’t talk about me.

Well, I need to give these people a little more credit. They don’t always speak badly of others, but they do sometimes reveal a lot of details about the lives of others, their failures, their marriage problems, their inadequacies and shortcomings especially in the area of ministry. It is so tempting to join in the conversation because it makes one feel accepted when people invite you in the confidence “of others”.

I am also glad people don’t talk about me because I feel inadequate at times, I am not the perfect husband and dad, and I have shared my inadequacies with my friends. I have made a few dumb mistakes in ministry and in life, and sometimes I just did not know how to do what I was doing. The average guy.

Then there are a few leaders whom I know that don’t talk about anyone. They are tight lipped, and you can’t pry their mouths open with a crowbar. One of them is my pastor, Mike. I can’t get any news out of the guy, and I am quite sure no one can get any “negative” news about me from him. Thanks Mike!

I know another leader like Mike, but he would want to remain nameless. He praises everyone in public – and in private. When he talks about people’s accomplishments he embellishes them to make the people look really good. He has done this to me, and I felt awkward because I know the failures that have accompanied the accomplishments. This guy just didn’t feel the need to mention the failures and shortcomings. However, he did mention his own shortcomings on the mission field which made me feel a lot better about my clumsy journey. He has helped many in the same way.

No, I am not stupid, just being constructively sarcastic. I know that if my closest friends would talk about their closest friends in front of me then my life might be too juicy to pass up when I am not around. Don’t worry; I am not paranoid about people talking about me right now. Really, all is quiet on the Eastern Front. It is just a point that has to be made. I have run my mouth at times, and was convicted later. No one is really innocent in this.

We reap what we sow, so I am without excuse if my name goes through the ringer. I can contribute to an overall atmosphere that will eventually turn on me also or lift me up. I find that I must prepare my heart when getting around crowds and even leaders. I tell myself, “Mike, don’t talk so much. You WILL be tempted to gossip especially under the guise of ministry. Just shut your mouth.” I also try to preemptively praise others so that any attempt to gossip by others will have to go through an awkward barrier. It is a discipline.

When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise. Prov 10:19

Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Eph 4:29

He who conceals a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates intimate friends. Prov 17:9